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Borderlands (2024)

-Written by Kyle Bain.


When Lilith (Cate Blanchett) is hired by Atlas (Edgar Ramirez) to find and save his daughter, Tina (Ariana Greenblatt), she finds herself amidst a wasteland of formidable foes and blithering idiots. Slowly but surely Lilith meets and teams up with a misfit bunch of individuals as they attempt to effectively save the world (even though they didn’t know it needed to be saved). Borderlands follows the best-selling video game series of the same name–and for those of you out there expecting an equally exciting film: don’t. 


There are some good aspects of Borderlands, including the world-building ability of the team behind the film. However, I’d imagine (never having played the games) that most of the world building came from those games, and the set designers had something ready for them when they arrived on scene the first day. Sure, they had to bring these things to life, and each and every set is vibrant and immersive–but it’s only fair to mention that they didn’t develop this from scratch. Additionally, the costume design is wonderful. Like the sets, the costumes allow the film to be more immersive, something that Borderlands desperately needed–because there were a number of times that I wanted to get up from my seat in the theater and run away. Sort of feeling like I was part of this world helped me to stay in my seat. So, there’s that. 


Then there’s the all-star cast. Beyond Blanchett and Ramirez viewers see actors such as Kevin Hart (Roland), Jamie Lee Curtis (Tannis), and Jack Black (Claptrap) bring this video game film to life. Their existence is enough to bring people to the theater, to get them to spend their hard-earned cash on the film–but the actors aren’t given much, and their performances are ultimately lacking. I don’t think I can blame them, as most of the characters are underdeveloped and the script dictates comedy that many of the actors just aren’t capable of pulling off. For example, we all know Hart for loud, in-your-face comedy, yet he’s handed subtle, dry comedy. It doesn’t work for him; that’s not his fault, but that doesn’t change anything. Borderlands sees a lot of this throughout its hour-and-forty minute runtime, and, again and again, the film sinks further and further away from success as a result. 


The issues with the characters is sort of what many of the other issues stem from. Or vice versa. The script is boring, presenting boring, inconsequential dialogue throughout. It doesn’t allow characters to develop. There are far too many things going on, and interestingly enough, nothing going on at exactly the same time. Borderlands failed from the start, with a script that lent itself only to failure. 


The best way to describe my experience in the theater watching Borderlands is “bored.” I was bored from start to finish, caring about next to nothing and it rolled along at a snail’s pace. The only people that should watch Borderlands are the long-time, hardcore fans of the video game franchise–as you’ll likely be able to appreciate the nods and the easter eggs that I most certainly missed. Even then, Borderlands is a poorly-developed film that leaves a lot to be desired. Is the three percent that the film opened to on Rotten Tomatoes fair? Maybe not, but I don’t blame people for hating this film. 


Directed by Eli Roth. 


Written by Eli Roth & Joe Abercrombie. 


Starring Cate Blanchett, Kevin Hart, Edgar Ramirez, Jamie Lee Curtis, Ariana Greenblatt, Florian Munteanu, Janina Gavankar, Jack Black, etc. 


3/10 = WORTH WATCHING, BUT YOU’VE BEEN WARNED


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